婚礼上发生了什么让你为新娘感到难过的事情? Anne Carol Mercado 做出了回答

2021-03-07 00:29

What happened at a wedding that made you feel horrible for the bride? iyC世界播

婚礼上发生了什么让你为新娘感到难过的事情?iyC世界播


Answered by: Anne Carol Mercado,lived through nearly 4 decades of life experiences iyC世界播

回答者:安妮·卡罗尔·梅尔卡多,经历了近40年的人生经历iyC世界播


Nearly 90% of the 500 invited guests didn't attend the wedding. iyC世界播

500名受邀嘉宾中有近90%没有参加婚礼。iyC世界播


This wedding was recent, just last Christmas. The bride and groom, let's call them Michelle and Paul, were married on December 24, of all dates. iyC世界播

这场婚礼是最近的,就在去年圣诞节。新娘和新郎,让我们叫他们米歇尔和保罗,在所有的日子里都是在12月24日结婚的。iyC世界播


Michelle is a goddaughter of my aunt and her mom has been friends with my aunt since high school. Paul is a third generation Filipino Chinese but his grandmother is very traditional. She insisted on consulting a feng shui expert, who claimed that December 24 was the best date for the couple to get married on. How he decided on this advice, I have no idea. iyC世界播

米歇尔是我姑姑的教女,她妈妈从高中起就是我姑姑的朋友。保罗是第三代菲律宾华人,但他的祖母非常传统。她坚持咨询风水专家,后者声称12月24日是两人结婚的最佳日期。我不知道他是如何决定接受这个建议的。iyC世界播


In Filipino culture, Christmas is the most important holiday of the year. During Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, Filipinos will surely be home to celebrate these days with their families. How Filipino families will spend Christmas is always pre-planned, so don't think they'll give up being with their families on a very special occasion just so they can attend your wedding. iyC世界播

在菲律宾文化中,圣诞节是一年中最重要的节日。在平安夜和圣诞节期间,菲律宾人肯定会回家和家人一起庆祝这几天。菲律宾家庭如何度过圣诞节总是事先计划好的,所以不要以为他们会为了参加你的婚礼而放弃在一个非常特殊的场合与家人在一起。iyC世界播


Michelle's mom lamented that her daughter and future son-in-law almost had no say on the details of their own wedding, and that everyone in Paul's family seemed to blindly obey their matriarch. iyC世界播

米歇尔的母亲感叹说,她的女儿和未来的女婿几乎对自己婚礼的细节没有发言权,保罗家里的每个人似乎都盲目地服从他们的女族长。iyC世界播


As soon as my aunt received the wedding invitation, she called Michelle and her mom right away to let them know that she won't be able to attend the wedding. To make it even less likely for guests to attend, the wedding was set at 6 PM, which is going to be followed by dinner at a hotel. Knowing how big weddings really go, the 6PM ceremony will last for an hour, then it's followed by endless picture taking in the church, which is followed by even more picture taking at the reception. When guests finish dinner, there's going to be a program and other traditional wedding stuff that will take hours. So, the guests will be essentially spending Christmas Eve at this wedding and not at home with their families. iyC世界播

我姑姑一收到婚礼请柬,就马上打电话给米歇尔和她妈妈,告诉他们她不能参加婚礼了。为了降低宾客参加婚礼的可能性,婚礼定于下午6点举行,随后将在一家酒店共进晚餐。知道婚礼到底有多隆重,下午6点的仪式将持续一个小时,然后是在教堂里不停地拍照,然后是在招待会上拍更多的照片。当客人用完晚餐后,将会有一个计划和其他传统的婚礼活动,这将需要几个小时的时间。因此,宾客们基本上是在婚礼上度过平安夜,而不是在家里和家人在一起。iyC世界播


So the wedding took place as planned, but only two or three members of the entourage made it. After pictures were taken in the church, the two bridesmaids and the best man, who is the only part of the groom's entourage who made it, left and rushed to get home. iyC世界播

婚礼如期举行,但只有两三名随行人员出席。在教堂拍照后,两名伴娘和伴郎离开,赶回家。伴郎是新郎随行人员中唯一幸存的人。iyC世界播


The reception was really sad. Only family members were left in attendance that the program was nixed. iyC世界播

招待会真的很郁闷。只有家庭成员出席了该计划,因此该计划被取消。iyC世界播


A few days after the wedding, my aunt had a chat with Michelle's mom and she was still disappointed. She had hoped that the wedding would be set on a different day so that most of the guests could attend. She said that the function hall was practically vacant with rows of empty tables. The servers who were hired to accommodate 500 guests ended up serving one guest each. She sent my aunt a picture that looked like this: iyC世界播

婚礼几天后,我姑姑和米歇尔的妈妈聊天,她仍然很失望。她曾希望婚礼安排在不同的日子,这样大多数宾客都能参加。她说,功能大厅几乎是空置的,有一排排空桌子。被雇来容纳500名客人的服务员最终每人为一名客人服务。她给我阿姨寄了一张照片,是这样的:iyC世界播


iyC世界播


It really baffles me why this wedding still took place as planned and there didn't seem to be any adjustments made. It's truly bizarre and not something a bride would like to remember about what could have been the happiest day of her life. iyC世界播

我真的不明白为什么这场婚礼仍然按计划举行,而且似乎没有任何调整。这真的很奇怪,新娘不想记住这可能是她一生中最幸福的一天。iyC世界播


Edit: First, thank you for the upvotes I never thought my answer would get this much attention since the question was answered many times before I did. iyC世界播

编辑:首先,谢谢你的好评,我从来没有想过我的答案会得到如此多的关注,因为这个问题在我回答之前已经回答了很多次。iyC世界播


If I did not reply to your comment, it means I can't find it :( I don't get notifications on some comments. iyC世界播

如果我没有回复你的评论,那就意味着我找不到它:(有些评论我没有收到通知。iyC世界播


I've been to many weddings and have heard of and seen some unpleasant things happen that I can add a few more to this answer. The reason why I chose this wedding for my answer is because of it being so bizarre, it's unbelievable. iyC世界播

我参加过很多婚礼,听说并目睹了一些令人不快的事情发生,我可以在这个答案上再加几句。我之所以选择这场婚礼作为我的答案,是因为它太离奇了,简直令人难以置信。iyC世界播


Here are some information to help explain how the wedding went as it did and I learned this from my aunt after I posted this answer. iyC世界播

这里有一些信息可以帮助解释婚礼是如何进行的,在我贴出这个答案后,我从我的姑姑那里了解到了这一点。iyC世界播


The grandmother paid for the bulk of the wedding expenses. She paid close to 90% of the costs and in a way it helped explain why she had the last say on the decisions. If the wedding was meant to be a gift (this is only a speculation), she should have just given the money to the couple so they can plan their wedding according to their choices. iyC世界播

祖母支付了婚礼的大部分费用。她支付了近90%的费用,在某种程度上,这有助于解释为什么她对决策拥有最后发言权。如果婚礼是一份礼物(这只是一种猜测),她就应该把钱给这对夫妇,这样他们就可以根据自己的选择来计划婚礼了。iyC世界播


I still can't get my head around this: Grandma booked the venue on the day the invitations were sent out. So there really was no point in waiting for RSVP. One of the wedding planners quit at this point— not surprising at all. iyC世界播

我还是想不通这件事:奶奶在邀请函发出的当天就订好了会场。因此,等待回复真的没有意义。其中一位婚礼策划人在这一点上辞职了,这一点都不令人惊讶。iyC世界播


Before the invitations were sent out, the bride's family was advised by several friends that a Christmas Eve wedding is not a good idea. According to my aunt, one of the bride's uncles was heard saying, "I told Michelle not to expect us if she's having her wedding on Christmas Eve. We already made plans." Several friends also said basically the same. "If the wedding is on Christmas Eve, we won't make it. Count us out." So the family already knew that many of the guests won't make it. The groom informed his family of this. Clearly they were not able to convince grandma, who said, "We will proceed as planned." I'm pretty sure one can still cancel or make reductions on catering services at reasonable charges but grandma did not. Well, it's her money. iyC世界播

在邀请函发出之前,几位朋友建议新娘的家人在平安夜举行婚礼不是一个好主意。据我姑姑说,有人听到新娘的一位叔叔说:“我告诉米歇尔,如果她在平安夜举行婚礼,不要期待我们。我们已经有计划了。”几位朋友也表示基本相同。“如果婚礼在平安夜举行,我们就赶不上了。别把我们算在内。”所以这家人已经知道很多客人来不了了。新郎把这件事告诉了他的家人。显然他们没能说服奶奶,奶奶说:“我们会按计划进行的。”我敢肯定,人们仍然可以以合理的费用取消或减少餐饮服务,但奶奶没有这样做。嗯,那是她的钱。。iyC世界播


The few members of the entourage who made it apparently had an agreement with the couple. The best man and two bridesmaids, one of them turned maid of honor, promised the bride and groom that they will stand for them during the ceremony at 6PM, but also promised their families they will be home in time to spend Christmas Eve. This is why they appeared to have ditched the couple at the church when they did not. Because of this lack of a wedding party, certain parts of the ceremony were "altered." it got me asking this question, if there were only this few members of the entourage, couldn't members of the family take their place? It seems that the more details I got, the more questions I have. iyC世界播

为数不多的几名随行人员显然与这对夫妇达成了协议。伴郎和两名伴娘(其中一人成为伴娘)向新娘和新郎承诺,他们将在下午6点的仪式上代表他们,但也向家人承诺,他们会及时回家度过平安夜。这就是为什么他们似乎在教堂抛弃了这对夫妇,而他们并没有这样做。由于没有举行婚礼,仪式的某些部分被“改动”了。这让我不禁要问,如果随行人员只有这几个人,难道家人就不能取代他们的位置吗?似乎我得到的细节越多,我的问题就越多。iyC世界播


The "RSVP" doesn't always work in my culture. Sadly, most people do not bother replying to an invitation. If they want to attend, they'll simply show up and sometimes they do so with extra guests in tow. If they don't or can't make it to the occasion, they will simply do not show up. I know this from experience. This also explains why in most gatherings, the host prepares food based on the number of people who were invited, not with the number of people who confirmed to attend. Paul's grandmother must have had the same thought, but it was definitely not a smart move to go ahead and have the caterers prepare according to the number of invited guests. Adjustments should have been made when several guests already expressed their regrets about not being able to attend in favor of spending Christmas Eve with families. iyC世界播

“回复”在我的文化中并不总是有效的。遗憾的是,大多数人都不会费心回复邀请。如果他们想参加,他们只会出现,有时他们会带着额外的客人来参加。如果他们没有或不能出席这个场合,他们就根本不会出现。我从经验中知道这一点。这也解释了为什么在大多数聚会中,主人根据被邀请的人数准备食物,而不是根据确认参加的人数。保罗的祖母肯定也有同样的想法,但按照邀请的客人数量让宴席承办人准备,这绝对不是明智之举。当几位客人已经表达了他们对不能参加而支持与家人共度平安夜的遗憾时,应该做出调整。iyC世界播


One guest told my aunt, "It is wrong of them to assume we'll give up Christmas Eve in favor of the wedding. If you invite me for any occasion on a Christmas Eve, it is understood that I will not attend." I'm assuming the other guests shared the same sentiment. iyC世界播

一位客人告诉我姑姑,“他们认为我们会为了婚礼而放弃平安夜,这是错误的。如果你在平安夜邀请我参加任何场合,不言而喻,我不会参加。”我猜其他客人也有同样的感受。iyC世界播


There was a compromise on the wedding date and the wedding ceremony. I was also curious about this and I learned that the families came to an agreement. The wedding ceremony was held by Catholic rites in deference to the bride's religion, but the date of the wedding will be decided by the groom's family, who are Chinese, thru a feng shui reading. It was probably an attempt at combining traditions for the merging of two families but it did not work. iyC世界播

在婚礼日期和婚礼仪式上达成了妥协。我也对此感到好奇,我了解到这两个家庭达成了协议。婚礼是按照天主教仪式举行的,以尊重新娘的宗教信仰,但婚礼的日期将由新郎的家人通过读风水来决定,新郎是中国人。这可能是为了将两个家族合并的传统结合起来,但并不奏效。iyC世界播


There's definitely a lot of absurdity on this wedding that I still find it hard to believe the entire thing happened at all. I hope for the best for the couple. iyC世界播

这场婚礼肯定有很多荒唐之处,我仍然很难相信整件事都发生了。我希望这对夫妇能有最好的结果。iyC世界播


Thank you for reading :) iyC世界播

感谢您阅读:)iyC世界播

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